This picture was taken just over three years ago, and just minutes after we arrived home with our new little (and I mean little, she was only 5lbs. 7 oz!) daughter. She was not quite two days old at the time and we were still a little bit in shock over the events of the previous 48 or so hours.
For the sake of having this story in writing somewhere, as well as to fill in those who aren't yet familiar with the story of Kiara and how she came to us, I will explain. On Monday, July 31, 2006 at around 8:45pm as Ben & I were watching Law & Order and folding laundry, we got a phone call from a caseworker with our adoption agency. She identified herself as Jodi and explained that she had a young girl who was interested in talking to us and would we like to meet her. Of course I told her we would love to talk to this girl. Jodi then apologized for all of the background noise and explained that she was at the hospital because 5 birthmoms were in labor at the same time and it was a little chaotic.
At that point I realized that Jodi probably wouldn't be bothering to call us that late at night, especially with everything else going on, unless this was an urgent situation. And so I asked if this girl who wanted to talk to us was one of those 5 in labor. Her response is something I'll never forget: "Oh no, she's not in labor. She already delivered the baby about 3 hours ago. You need to get out to the hospital as soon as you can." She also went on to explain that "S" just wanted to talk to us and that this was in no way a commitment to us or a promise of any kind. It was only a conversation. I told her I understood and then hung up the phone.
What happened next was a scene straight out of the movies when a woman goes in to labor and both the man and woman lose all common sense and start running around frantically, not remembering how to act like rational, functional human beings. Before that point I had always felt those depictions were a little exaggerated and trite but at 8:50 that night, I was just such an exaggeration. I couldn't get complete sentences out and I was pulling clothes out of my closet faster than I could believe. I remember asking Ben what I should wear and he just stared at me as if I were speaking Russian. (BTW, I ended up choosing a denim skirt and a white sweater--an outfit I had never before worn, nor have I worn it since. I was kicking myself the whole way to the hospital, convinced that there was no way "S" could choose us after she saw me in such a bland, unflattering outfit. I still laugh over that mental crisis!)
Well eventually we got dressed and on our way and while the hospital was only 20 minutes away, the drive seemed to take an hour. We were experiencing emotions we never knew existed and we called each of our parents to tell them to start praying.
When we arrived at the hospital and finally found an entrance that was unlocked, we went up an elevator and were greeted by Jodi. She talked to us a little bit and then took us in to a room to introduce us to "S," the girl who would soon change our lives forever.
We had a little small talk for a minute and then she began asking us some questions and getting to know us. Not too long after we started talking she asked us if we would like to see the baby. We still didn't even know if she had had a boy or a girl and we definitely didn't know if she was going to choose us to be the family for her child. We still said we'd like to see the baby though and figured everything else would work itself out.
A minute later one of the caseworkers brought in the most beautiful, radiant child I had ever seen. She handed her to me and I stared in complete awe at this little child, whose spirit seemed so strong and familiar to me. I had never felt such an instant bond to anyone in my whole life and I fell in love with her instantly. Then it dawned on me: "S" still hadn't chosen us. I had no control over whether or not I would be taking this child home and this may be the only time I would hold this precious baby. And then we heard the words that we had dreamed about. "S" told her caseworker that we were it. We were the parents for her child and she was supposed to be ours! Ben and I stared at each other in disbelief and uttered the only words we could come up with: "thank you." They seemed so pathetic and insufficient and yet we couldn't think of anything else to say.
Quickly the conversation turned to what we should name this little girl and "S" told us that she had been thinking about the name Kiara. Ben and I had always wanted to name our first daughter MaKenna but it just didn't seem to fit her. We threw the name around for a bit and all decided that she was indeed a Kiara and that her middle name would be after my grandma, Mae.
And so over the next day and a half we got to know little Kiara Mae and fell in love with her more every minute. We marveled at her glow and commented that she was going to be a peacemaker. We told her about her grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins and about how we had been waiting a long time for her to come in to our lives. It was so apparent to us that a loving Heavenly Father had orchestrated every detail in bringing the 3 of us together and that we were meant to be a family.
Now, three years later, I still find myself in disbelief every now and then about all of the miracles that had to happen for us to find each other. I also still have a hard time imagining the strength and courage that it took "S" to turn over this gorgeous girl to us. I know that she knew it was the right thing to do and I know that she is at peace with her decision and for these things I am so grateful.
I have always felt that Kiara and I knew each other before July 31, 2006 and even as I type this Kiara is reading my mind. She just came up to me and said "It's a dream come true!" I asked her what was a dream come true and her reply was simple yet oh so true: "I am."
I love you baby doll and I am so proud and honored to be your mother. You have filled my life with so much joy and laughter. You are the perfect cure for a bad day and you always know just how to cheer me up. Thank you for making the last three years the happiest of my life and for each day teaching me how to be a better person. Your spirit and your light are unparalleled and my love for you grows stronger each day. I am so grateful for the time we've been able to spend with you as an only child and watch your personality take shape. You are simply amazing! Thank you for finding Daddy and me and for being patient with us while we try to figure out this whole parenting thing! You are an incredible person and I can't wait to see what you do with your life. I love you sweet girl.
For the sake of having this story in writing somewhere, as well as to fill in those who aren't yet familiar with the story of Kiara and how she came to us, I will explain. On Monday, July 31, 2006 at around 8:45pm as Ben & I were watching Law & Order and folding laundry, we got a phone call from a caseworker with our adoption agency. She identified herself as Jodi and explained that she had a young girl who was interested in talking to us and would we like to meet her. Of course I told her we would love to talk to this girl. Jodi then apologized for all of the background noise and explained that she was at the hospital because 5 birthmoms were in labor at the same time and it was a little chaotic.
At that point I realized that Jodi probably wouldn't be bothering to call us that late at night, especially with everything else going on, unless this was an urgent situation. And so I asked if this girl who wanted to talk to us was one of those 5 in labor. Her response is something I'll never forget: "Oh no, she's not in labor. She already delivered the baby about 3 hours ago. You need to get out to the hospital as soon as you can." She also went on to explain that "S" just wanted to talk to us and that this was in no way a commitment to us or a promise of any kind. It was only a conversation. I told her I understood and then hung up the phone.
What happened next was a scene straight out of the movies when a woman goes in to labor and both the man and woman lose all common sense and start running around frantically, not remembering how to act like rational, functional human beings. Before that point I had always felt those depictions were a little exaggerated and trite but at 8:50 that night, I was just such an exaggeration. I couldn't get complete sentences out and I was pulling clothes out of my closet faster than I could believe. I remember asking Ben what I should wear and he just stared at me as if I were speaking Russian. (BTW, I ended up choosing a denim skirt and a white sweater--an outfit I had never before worn, nor have I worn it since. I was kicking myself the whole way to the hospital, convinced that there was no way "S" could choose us after she saw me in such a bland, unflattering outfit. I still laugh over that mental crisis!)
Well eventually we got dressed and on our way and while the hospital was only 20 minutes away, the drive seemed to take an hour. We were experiencing emotions we never knew existed and we called each of our parents to tell them to start praying.
When we arrived at the hospital and finally found an entrance that was unlocked, we went up an elevator and were greeted by Jodi. She talked to us a little bit and then took us in to a room to introduce us to "S," the girl who would soon change our lives forever.
We had a little small talk for a minute and then she began asking us some questions and getting to know us. Not too long after we started talking she asked us if we would like to see the baby. We still didn't even know if she had had a boy or a girl and we definitely didn't know if she was going to choose us to be the family for her child. We still said we'd like to see the baby though and figured everything else would work itself out.
A minute later one of the caseworkers brought in the most beautiful, radiant child I had ever seen. She handed her to me and I stared in complete awe at this little child, whose spirit seemed so strong and familiar to me. I had never felt such an instant bond to anyone in my whole life and I fell in love with her instantly. Then it dawned on me: "S" still hadn't chosen us. I had no control over whether or not I would be taking this child home and this may be the only time I would hold this precious baby. And then we heard the words that we had dreamed about. "S" told her caseworker that we were it. We were the parents for her child and she was supposed to be ours! Ben and I stared at each other in disbelief and uttered the only words we could come up with: "thank you." They seemed so pathetic and insufficient and yet we couldn't think of anything else to say.
Quickly the conversation turned to what we should name this little girl and "S" told us that she had been thinking about the name Kiara. Ben and I had always wanted to name our first daughter MaKenna but it just didn't seem to fit her. We threw the name around for a bit and all decided that she was indeed a Kiara and that her middle name would be after my grandma, Mae.
And so over the next day and a half we got to know little Kiara Mae and fell in love with her more every minute. We marveled at her glow and commented that she was going to be a peacemaker. We told her about her grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins and about how we had been waiting a long time for her to come in to our lives. It was so apparent to us that a loving Heavenly Father had orchestrated every detail in bringing the 3 of us together and that we were meant to be a family.
Now, three years later, I still find myself in disbelief every now and then about all of the miracles that had to happen for us to find each other. I also still have a hard time imagining the strength and courage that it took "S" to turn over this gorgeous girl to us. I know that she knew it was the right thing to do and I know that she is at peace with her decision and for these things I am so grateful.
I have always felt that Kiara and I knew each other before July 31, 2006 and even as I type this Kiara is reading my mind. She just came up to me and said "It's a dream come true!" I asked her what was a dream come true and her reply was simple yet oh so true: "I am."
I love you baby doll and I am so proud and honored to be your mother. You have filled my life with so much joy and laughter. You are the perfect cure for a bad day and you always know just how to cheer me up. Thank you for making the last three years the happiest of my life and for each day teaching me how to be a better person. Your spirit and your light are unparalleled and my love for you grows stronger each day. I am so grateful for the time we've been able to spend with you as an only child and watch your personality take shape. You are simply amazing! Thank you for finding Daddy and me and for being patient with us while we try to figure out this whole parenting thing! You are an incredible person and I can't wait to see what you do with your life. I love you sweet girl.
Love,
Mommy
Mommy
9 comments:
How sweet! I am so glad that you shared your story! I am so happy for you and your family!
It is amazing how everything works out the way it is supposed to. Happy Birthday Kiara.
Kiara - I love you very much and am extremely proud of you. Happy Birthday!!
Katie - You captured that evening beautifully. I love how you know just what to say to capture, and explain, a moment. I love you.
Beautiful!!!! :)
That just made me cry!! Thanks for sharing such a beautiful story! Miracles still happen!!
We sure love that adorable little angel. Can't wait to see you guys in a few weeks. Thanks for coming out. It really means a lot to Whitney.
Precious! I loved hearing the story.
What a sweet post. She is adorable. We love you all!
What a beautiful story...thanks so much for sharing. Kiara is a doll!
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