Going home

I miss the days of blogging regularly. I used to upload the pictures from my camera the same day I took them and then immediately blog about the pictures and the stories behind them. Then Boston was born and suddenly my free time was not as abundant. Now I think about blogging often but when I do have time to sit down and write I either don't have my camera nearby, have writer's block or I start reading other blogs instead. Today there are no excuses though. I have all of these cute pictures and stories of my kids' young lives and I want to remember them so no more excuses! 

Most people who read this blog (if there's anybody left!) already know but for the sake of having a written record, I'll give an update on our situation. Back in November when we were in Utah for Thanksgiving, Ben interviewed for a promotion/transfer with his company. The new position would be based in SLC and we'd be able to be back by family. On December 7th we found out that he had gotten the job and they wanted him to start at the beginning of the new year. We were already planning on driving to Utah on the 18th then flying from Salt Lake to New Hampshire on the 20th and staying there for the whole Christmas break. The only way the timing was going to work for him to start his new position at the beginning of the year was for us to move on the 18th. So 11 days after we found out he got the job, we emptied our house in to a moving truck and said some very hard (harder than I ever imagined!) goodbyes to many incredible friends who had become our California family. 

As we were driving past the very same spot in Stockton where we had been sitting in traffic 3+ years earlier, during our trip to interview with the Ports, my emotions overcame me. I remembered how scared and hesitant I was that day thinking about the adventure on which we were about to embark. With the exception of a summer in Montana in 2005, I had never lived farther than 45 minutes from my family and the Utah culture was all I knew. The thought of leaving everyone we knew and loved and starting over in a new state where we knew NOBODY was so frightening to me. I was sure I wouldn't be able to handle it and I'd be miserable. I was sure I wouldn't be able to make any, let alone the right decisions, without my brothers there to instruct me. And I was sure that I wouldn't fit in the California lifestyle and I'd never make any friends. 

Now, 3 years later,  as we were driving away from the place we had come to know and love so much I couldn't imagine not living there. I couldn't imagine what my life would be like or the person I would be if I hadn't had those experiences or made the friends I had. To think I could have gone the next 50 years without meeting Janie or Yannette or Kate or Eva! And now I had to go back to Utah and leave all of those people behind? Even though we were going "home" the thought was quite saddening. I suddenly wondered if we had made the right decision in leaving CA, though rationally I knew we had. Then I remembered something else about our trip 3 years earlier. I remembered sitting in church singing Hymn #89, "The Lord is my Light." The first line of that hymn says, "The Lord is my light, then why should I fear?" Later on in verse 3 it says, "The Lord is my light, the Lord is my strength. I know in His might I'll conquer at length." When I sang that hymn and heard those words back in 2007 I was immediately calm and I knew that no matter what choices I ever made in life, as long as I made them with the blessing of my Heavenly Father, I'd be fine. No matter what state we live in or what earthly family lives near us, He IS my light and He will ALWAYS be with me, right by my side, so I really don't have any reason to be afraid. That reassurance was definitely a tender mercy from a loving Father and was exactly what I needed at that point. 

Over the next 2 days we drove 21 hours (we had to go the long way through Vegas because I-80 was shut down through Donner Pass due to weather) through torrential rain and a little snow. Our kids were perfect and I was so proud of how patient and flexible they were with us throughout the whole moving ordeal. We finally got in to Salt Lake Sunday evening and were so excited to be here for good! It's now been almost 3 months that we've been back and we're settling in pretty well. Ben is doing great at his new job and just recently started classes for his MBA so we don't get to see him as much as we did with his old position but it just makes us appreciate the time we do have with him that much more! We are living with my parents right now while our house is being built and it's going pretty well, although we can't wait to be in our new home! I'm so excited to finally be settled and in one place permanently! 

Kiara loves being back here by Grandma and Papa and all of her cousins and we've already made some new friends through a transracial family playgroup that meets once a week. One of the biggest sacrifices of moving back here from CA is that we lost all of that ethnic diversity and we've had to seek out opportunities to meet families similar to ours, so we're grateful to have found this group. 

Boston is growing and learning more every day and his little personality is so entertaining! He's really starting to form opinions and isn't afraid to express them! I love hearing him try to talk and watch the little wheels turn inside his head as he realizes what tasks he's capable of doing himself. We've definitely got 2 independent little spirits on our hands but we wouldn't have it any other way! 

Life is good!